{"id":4965,"date":"2017-11-15T06:09:40","date_gmt":"2017-11-15T06:09:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.imagoafrica.co.za\/?p=4965"},"modified":"2017-11-15T06:09:40","modified_gmt":"2017-11-15T06:09:40","slug":"teens-need-parents","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/imagoafrica.co.za\/for-professionals\/teens-need-parents\/","title":{"rendered":"What Teens Need Most From Their Parents"},"content":{"rendered":"<h1 class=\"wsj-article-headline\">What Teens Need Most From Their Parents<\/h1>\n<p><em><strong>Imago Africa presents workshops to facilitate a deeper understanding of these confusing years for both teens and their parents. See our events calendar for the next event.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<h2 class=\"sub-head\">As adolescents navigate the stormiest years in their development, they need coaching, support, good examples and most of all understanding<\/h2>\n<p>The teenage years can be mystifying for parents. Sensible children turn scatter-brained or start having wild mood swings.<br \/>\nFormerly level-headed adolescents ride in cars with dangerous drivers or take other foolish risks.<\/p>\n<p>A flood of <a href=\"http:\/\/www.wsj.com\/video\/a-parent-guide-to-the-mysterious-teenager\/A4D1BC2C-AFD4-42BD-80E3-3C6257E0B37C.html\">new research<\/a> offers explanations for some of these mysteries.<br \/>\nBrain imaging adds another kind of data that can help test hypotheses and corroborate teens\u2019 own accounts of their behavior and emotions.<br \/>\nDozens of recent multiyear studies have traced adolescent development through time, rather than comparing sets of adolescents at a single point.<\/p>\n<p>The new longitudinal research is changing scientists\u2019 views on the role parents play in helping children navigate a volatile decade.<br \/>\nOnce seen as a time for parents to step back, adolescence is increasingly viewed as an opportunity to stay tuned in and emotionally connected.<br \/>\nThe research makes it possible to identify four important phases in the development of intellectual, social and emotional skills that most teens will<br \/>\nexperience at certain ages. Here is a guide to the latest findings:<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><strong>Ages 11 to 12<\/strong><\/span><br \/>\nAs puberty takes center stage, tweens can actually slip backward in some basic skills. Spatial learning and certain kinds of reasoning may decline at this stage,<br \/>\nstudies show. Parts of the brain responsible for prospective memory, or remembering what you are supposed to do in the future, are still maturing.<br \/>\nThis may be why a teen may seem clueless if asked to give the teacher a note before school.<\/p>\n<p>Coaching tweens in organizational skills can help. Parents can help build memory cues into daily routines, such as placing a gym bag by the front door, or helping<br \/>\nset reminders on a cellphone. They can share helpful tools, such as task-manager apps.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-4966\" src=\"http:\/\/www.imagoafrica.co.za\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/teens-300x200.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"200\" \/><\/p>\n<p><em><span class=\"wsj-article-caption-content\">Young teens\u2019 reasoning and decision-making skills often aren\u2019t fully developed; parents can coach them in being organized and considering other points of view.<\/span>\u00a0<span class=\"wsj-article-credit\"><span class=\"wsj-article-credit-tag\">ILLUSTRATION:\u00a0<\/span>ROBERT NEUBECKER<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p>Parents can help foster sound decision-making, thinking through pros and cons and considering other viewpoints.<br \/>\nChildren who know by age 10 or 11 how to make sound decisions tend to exhibit less anxiety and sadness, get in fewer fights and have fewer<br \/>\nproblems with friends at ages 12 and 13, according to a 2014 study of 76 participants published in the Journal of Behavioral Decision Making.<\/p>\n<p>By remaining warm and supportive, parents may be able to influence the way their teen\u2019s brain develops at this stage.<br \/>\nA 2014 study of 188 children compared the effect of mothers \u200bwho were warm, affectionate and approving during disagreements, versus mothers who became angry<br \/>\nand argumentative. Teens at age 16, who had affectionate moms when they were 12, \u200bshowed brain changes linked to lower rates of sadness and anxiety and greater<br \/>\nself-control, according to the study led by researchers at the University of Melbourne in Australia.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><strong>Ages 13 to 14<\/strong><\/span><br \/>\nParents should brace themselves for what is often a wildly emotional passage. Young teens become sensitive to peers\u2019 opinions and react strongly to them.<br \/>\nYet the social skills they need to figure out what their peers really think won\u2019t be fully mature for years, making this a confusing and potentially miserable time.<\/p>\n<p>At about this time, teens\u2019 response to stress goes haywire, sparking more door-slamming and tears. The impact of social stress is peaking around this time:<br \/>\nOf adults with mental disorders often triggered by stress, 50% received a diagnosis before age 15. Other research shows teens from ages 11 to 15 become sad<br \/>\nand anxious when subjected to social stresses such exclusion from social groups, while adults don\u2019t show a similar effect.<\/p>\n<p>Parts of the brain most vulnerable to stress are still maturing, so coping strategies teens use at this stage can become ingrained in the brain\u2019s<br \/>\ncircuitry as lifelong patterns, according to a 2016 research review in Developmental Science Review. Psychologists advise teaching and modeling self-soothing<br \/>\nskills, such as meditation, exercise or listening to music.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone  wp-image-4967\" src=\"http:\/\/www.imagoafrica.co.za\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/teens-2-300x200.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"411\" height=\"274\" \/><\/p>\n<p><em><span class=\"wsj-article-caption-content\">Teens are susceptible to social stress at ages 13-14. Parents can help decode peers\u2019 social cues and model healthy coping behavior, like exercise or meditation.<\/span>\u00a0<span class=\"wsj-article-credit\"><span class=\"wsj-article-credit-tag\">ILLUSTRATION:\u00a0<\/span>ROBERT NEUBECKER<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p>Coach teens on friendship skills, including how to read their peers\u2019 expressions and body language. Encourage them to choose friends based on shared interests,<br \/>\nnot popularity, and to dump friends who are unkind. Teach them how to repair friendships after a fight by apologizing, making amends or compromising.<\/p>\n<p>Family support is a stress buffer. Teens whose families provide companionship, problem-solving and emotional support are less likely to become depressed<br \/>\nafter exposure to severe stress, according to a 2016 study of 362 Israeli adolescents in the Journal of Family Psychology.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><strong>Ages 15 to 16<\/strong><\/span><br \/>\nTeens\u2019 appetite for risk-taking peaks at this age, according to a 2015 study of more than 200 participants ages 8 to 27 led by researchers at<br \/>\nLeiden University in the Netherlands. The brain\u2019s reward receptors are blossoming, amplifying adolescents\u2019 response to dopamine, a neurotransmitter<br \/>\nassociated with feelings of pleasure and satisfaction. This makes thrill-seeking more desirable than it will ever be again.<\/p>\n<p>Normal fears of danger are temporarily suppressed during adolescence, a shift scientists believe is rooted in an evolutionary need to<br \/>\nleave home and explore new habitats. Studies have found adolescents fail to change their appraisal of risky situations even after being<br \/>\nwarned that the hazards are greater than they expect.<\/p>\n<p>The ability to make and keep good friends is especially useful at this stage. Teens with friends they trust and count on for support are less<br \/>\nlikely to engage in risky behavior such as shoplifting, riding with a dangerous driver or having unprotected sex, according to a 2015 study<br \/>\nof 46 teens led by Dr. Eva Telzer, an assistant professor of psychology at the University of Illinois in Champaign-Urbana. Teens who argue often<br \/>\nwith close friends are more likely to take such gambles.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone  wp-image-4968\" src=\"http:\/\/www.imagoafrica.co.za\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/teens-3-300x200.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"388\" height=\"258\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em><span class=\"wsj-article-caption-content\">Thrill-seeking will never be more irresistible than it is for a 15- to 16-year-old, whose reward receptors in the brain are blossoming. Parents can still make a difference: Encourage healthy friendships; show warmth and support.<\/span>\u00a0<span class=\"wsj-article-credit\"><span class=\"wsj-article-credit-tag\">ILLUSTRATION:\u00a0<\/span>ROBERT NEUBECKER<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p>It is not too late for warm, supportive parents to make a difference. In a laboratory risk-taking test, teens who grew closer to their parents<br \/>\nstarting at age 15 showed less activation of a brain region linked to risk-taking and took fewer chances 18 months later, according to a 2015<br \/>\nstudy of 23 adolescents published in Developmental Cognitive Neuroscience. The closeness to parents included having parents\u2019 respect and help<br \/>\ntalking through problems, and an absence of arguing or yelling, according to the study, in which Dr. Telzer was a co-author.<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-size: 14pt;\"><strong>Ages 17 to 18<\/strong><\/span><br \/>\nBenefits of the teenage brain\u2019s ability to change and develop are evident at this stage. Some teens show increases in IQ.<br \/>\nIntellectually gifted teens are most likely to achieve gains in IQ scores, so teens who are already smart are likely to grow<br \/>\neven smarter, according to a 2013 study of 11,000 pairs of twins led by researchers at Penn State University, in University Park,<br \/>\nand the University of Colorado at Boulder.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone  wp-image-4969\" src=\"http:\/\/www.imagoafrica.co.za\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/teens-4-300x200.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"391\" height=\"260\" \/><\/p>\n<p><em><span class=\"wsj-article-caption-content\">Older teens can put the brakes on emotions and risk-taking; their problem-solving and strategy-planning skills are developing. They might need help deciphering ambiguous people and situations.<\/span>\u00a0<span class=\"wsj-article-credit\"><span class=\"wsj-article-credit-tag\">ILLUSTRATION:\u00a0<\/span>ROBERT NEUBECKER<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p>In older teens, the parts of the prefrontal cortex responsible for judgment and decision-making typically are developed<br \/>\nenough to serve as a brake on runaway emotions and risk-taking. Executive-function skills, such as solving problems and planning<br \/>\nstrategies, continue to develop at least through age 20, according to a 2015 study by researchers at Sheffield Hallam University, England.<\/p>\n<p>Social skills and related brain regions are still maturing, according to researchers including Sarah-Jayne Blakemore,<br \/>\na professor of cognitive neuroscience at University College London. At this stage, teens are better at noticing how others feel and<br \/>\nshowing empathy. They still lack the ability to decipher people\u2019s motives and attitudes in complex social situations, though, such as<br \/>\nfiguring out why a friend might suddenly change the subject during a conversation at a party.<\/p>\n<p>By<\/p>\n<div class=\"author mobile-scrim hasMenu open\" data-scrim=\"{&quot;type&quot;:&quot;author&quot;,&quot;header&quot;:&quot;Sue Shellenbarger&quot;,&quot;subhead&quot;:&quot;The Wall Street Journal&quot;,&quot;list&quot;:[{&quot;type&quot;:&quot;link&quot;,&quot;icon&quot;:&quot;bio&quot;,&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https:\/\/www.wsj.com\/news\/author\/6492&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Biography&quot;},{&quot;type&quot;:&quot;link&quot;,&quot;icon&quot;:&quot;google&quot;,&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https:\/\/plus.google.com\/108067620437052380746\/posts&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Google+&quot;},{&quot;type&quot;:&quot;link&quot;,&quot;icon&quot;:&quot;email&quot;,&quot;url&quot;:&quot;mailto:Sue.Shellenbarger@wsj.com&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Sue.Shellenbarger@wsj.com&quot;}]}\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.wsj.com\/articles\/what-teens-need-most-from-their-parents-1470765906\"><span class=\"name\">Sue Shellenbarger The Wall Street Journal 9 August 2016<\/span><\/a><\/div>\n<p>Write to Sue Shellenbarger at sue.shellenbarger@wsj.com<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What Teens Need Most From Their Parents Imago Africa presents workshops to facilitate a deeper understanding of these confusing years for both teens and their parents. See our events calendar for the next event. As adolescents navigate the stormiest years in their development, they need coaching, support, good examples and most of all understanding The [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":4968,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[34],"tags":[71,72,73,74,54],"class_list":["post-4965","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-imago-relationships","tag-parenting","tag-parenting-workshop","tag-relationships","tag-teens","tag-workshop"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>What Teens Need Most From Their Parents - Imago Africa<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/imagoafrica.co.za\/for-professionals\/teens-need-parents\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"What Teens Need Most From Their Parents - Imago Africa\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"What Teens Need Most From Their Parents Imago Africa presents workshops to facilitate a deeper understanding of these confusing years for both teens and their parents. 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